Dearest Smoker (is that you? I can't see through the haze...):
Ok, I can understand the sentiment regarding "it's my own life, and I'll live it however..." but when it comes to that phrase being uttered by a smoker (or pederasts or pyromaniacs or Whitney Houston) I have to draw the line. Yeah, you can smoke. Just not near me please. I'm all for separate rooms and the 'gold fish bowls' they make smokers go into in airports...by the way, aren't those funny?
"Look daddy! The last of the great American smoker!"
"don't tap the glass, son, you'll scare 'em away!"
heh, heh......Anyway...go to the 'smoking section' and give us a break. We're giving you one by making a 'smoking section' available in the first place. And if there isn't one...you must decide between: either a nice meal or perhaps a cocktail with some friends or your...butt, cig, coffin nail, gasper, pill, or skag. You know, I take it back! Those DO sound tasty!
I would take the smoking ban to mean 'no smoking in public places' and yes, that includes waiting in line outdoors or hanging out at a concert. Yeah, yeah, just 'cause there's no roof doesn't make it un-public. What smokers have to remember is that they are in an EXTREME minority and, most of us, don't care that you smoke. We would just like you to take it elsewhere. What? You have nowhere else to go? Go home then! What's that? Your wife/husband wont let you smoke inside? Isn't this all starting to tell you something? Far less addictive substances have been made illegal. Such as Heroin, Cocaine, meth-amphetamine, and in some more enlightened states, Planters Cheese Balls...man those are WAY too tasty!
In response to "...all the rules and regulations! Why don't we ban drinking again?" Have you noticed that you can't drink on the sidewalk in front of the bar? In fact, have you noticed that you can't just walk into a store, grab a bottle of liquor, lovingly remove the foil, place it to your lips, and take a long satisfying pull from it? (I bet you want a cigarette right now don't you?) In fact most stores won't let you enter with any open beverage of any kind...don't they love America? Have they never heard of Live Free or Die? Yes, dear reader, they must be communists!! Have you noticed there seems to be very few folks (and even fewer communists) just walking down the street enjoying a nice Mai Tai? That is because there are myriad rules and regulations regarding the consumption of alcohol. In comparison I see hardly a rule regarding smoking. Smokers tend to be one of the most vocal minorities out there and I, for one, am getting a bit tired of having to listen to 'em...and they're breath? Yikes!
But don't worry kids, the likes of Phillip Morris wont be dieing out any time soon. As I understand it the U.S. is probably tailing third for cigarette consumption in the world. I hear Asia and Europe are the ones really 'Live Free AND Dieing' by sucking up a lot of cigarettes not us. (What? We're number THREE? How can that be? USA! USA! USA! ...Umm...wait a minute...) And as it becomes less profitable for the big cigarette companies to support you, you will see the worm turning away from tolerating smoking in public places. Why would they abandon you? Because cigarette smokers are a VAST MINORITY in the United States! Remember that, and try to be polite. Here, have a mint.
"Look daddy! The last of the great American smoker!"
"don't tap the glass, son, you'll scare 'em away!"
heh, heh......Anyway...go to the 'smoking section' and give us a break. We're giving you one by making a 'smoking section' available in the first place. And if there isn't one...you must decide between: either a nice meal or perhaps a cocktail with some friends or your...butt, cig, coffin nail, gasper, pill, or skag. You know, I take it back! Those DO sound tasty!
I would take the smoking ban to mean 'no smoking in public places' and yes, that includes waiting in line outdoors or hanging out at a concert. Yeah, yeah, just 'cause there's no roof doesn't make it un-public. What smokers have to remember is that they are in an EXTREME minority and, most of us, don't care that you smoke. We would just like you to take it elsewhere. What? You have nowhere else to go? Go home then! What's that? Your wife/husband wont let you smoke inside? Isn't this all starting to tell you something? Far less addictive substances have been made illegal. Such as Heroin, Cocaine, meth-amphetamine, and in some more enlightened states, Planters Cheese Balls...man those are WAY too tasty!
In response to "...all the rules and regulations! Why don't we ban drinking again?" Have you noticed that you can't drink on the sidewalk in front of the bar? In fact, have you noticed that you can't just walk into a store, grab a bottle of liquor, lovingly remove the foil, place it to your lips, and take a long satisfying pull from it? (I bet you want a cigarette right now don't you?) In fact most stores won't let you enter with any open beverage of any kind...don't they love America? Have they never heard of Live Free or Die? Yes, dear reader, they must be communists!! Have you noticed there seems to be very few folks (and even fewer communists) just walking down the street enjoying a nice Mai Tai? That is because there are myriad rules and regulations regarding the consumption of alcohol. In comparison I see hardly a rule regarding smoking. Smokers tend to be one of the most vocal minorities out there and I, for one, am getting a bit tired of having to listen to 'em...and they're breath? Yikes!
But don't worry kids, the likes of Phillip Morris wont be dieing out any time soon. As I understand it the U.S. is probably tailing third for cigarette consumption in the world. I hear Asia and Europe are the ones really 'Live Free AND Dieing' by sucking up a lot of cigarettes not us. (What? We're number THREE? How can that be? USA! USA! USA! ...Umm...wait a minute...) And as it becomes less profitable for the big cigarette companies to support you, you will see the worm turning away from tolerating smoking in public places. Why would they abandon you? Because cigarette smokers are a VAST MINORITY in the United States! Remember that, and try to be polite. Here, have a mint.


1 Comments:
Smoker want me to send you a picture of my mother's scar where she had 2/3's of her lung removed? If u want to puff up that's yr choice, but I'd prefer to keep my 2/3's of a lung.
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